Never Mess With The Ocean…

First of all, the ocean is really freakin’ deep.


What we do know is that the pressure is so intense, no human* could make it even a quarter of the way down without THIS happening to his or her body:

This is what most of the ocean looks like:

 (If you’re afraid of the dark, I don’t recommend going to the bottom of the ocean.)

It’s probably better that it’s dark down there because THIS is the kind of sh*t you’d see:

I mean, there are ROLY-POLIES the size of your HEAD.

And SEA SPIDERS you’d need a bed sheet to squish!

And SEA WORMS big enough to use as jump ropes!

And whatever the hell THIS is:

Scientists estimate that up to 80% of all living things live in the ocean.

Since there is no sunlight, there are no plants. So nearly everything down there preys on FLESH.

Every freakfish in the deep sea is just swimming around, chomping on anything it can find.

What I’m getting at is this: Nearly everything has teeth.

It’s a freakin’ hellscape down there. There are vents of boiling-hot sulfuric acid that would take your face clean off your skull.

It literally snows sh*t.

(Just a constant steady flurry of fecal matter, organic material, and bacteria.)

And there are little to no standards of reality. For example, this is a barreleye:

The worst part is we’ve only explored less than 5% of the ocean.

So basically, we don’t even know what the heck is down there.

Which is why you NEVER MESS WITH THE OCEAN!!

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